Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Randomize