things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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