Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
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I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
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Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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