worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
