I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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