Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
you will always have a special place in my vag
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
