Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
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She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
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Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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