My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
