Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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