the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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