I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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