better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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