Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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