What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Randomize
