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I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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