look no pants
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I think I am morally bankrupt
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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