Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Randomize
