It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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