Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
