she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
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