im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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