Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Randomize