i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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