he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
