I like to think it a success when the cops are called
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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