I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I think I died a long time ago.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize
