Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
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