somebody snuck up and got me drunk
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Randomize