Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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