Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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