I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
