did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
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