Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(912): View more from Georgia

i woke up with socks on this morning

(485): View more from

so?

(912): View more from Georgia

i didnt wear socks last night

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(912): i woke up with socks on this morning (485): so? (912): i didnt wear socks last night http://tfl.nu/lw6k

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(314): View more from Missouri

First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.

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(314): First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom. http://tfl.nu/gkr4

Replies (13) Good night (872) Bad night (3736)
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(716): View more from New York

Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.

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(716): Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time. http://tfl.nu/ytyv

Replies (79) Good night (7388) Bad night (1403)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.

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(609): Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing. http://tfl.nu/en2f

Replies (26) Good night (1242) Bad night (6705)
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(708): View more from Illinois

My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.

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(708): My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase. http://tfl.nu/2212

Replies (4) Good night (1306) Bad night (3265)
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(419): View more from Ohio

I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.

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(419): I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned. http://tfl.nu/xmxl

Replies (10) Good night (2526) Bad night (659)
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(218): View more from Minnesota

You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.

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(218): You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears. http://tfl.nu/cuw5

Replies (24) Good night (4176) Bad night (715)
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(262): View more from Wisconsin

Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that

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(262): Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that http://tfl.nu/fjxw

Replies (9) Good night (604) Bad night (1134)
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(774): View more from Massachusetts

This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey

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(774): This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey http://tfl.nu/q901

Replies (10) Good night (1722) Bad night (616)
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(516): View more from New York

How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?

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(516): How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted? http://tfl.nu/oqcu

Replies (9) Good night (588) Bad night (720)
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(218): View more from Minnesota

Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.

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(218): Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else. http://tfl.nu/z0p4

Replies (3) Good night (330) Bad night (759)
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(207): View more from Maine

You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?

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(207): You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet? http://tfl.nu/ukgu

Replies (5) Good night (897) Bad night (313)
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(408): View more from California

I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.

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(408): I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks. http://tfl.nu/3vr5

Replies (2) Good night (344) Bad night (237)
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(818): View more from California

Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business

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(818): Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business http://tfl.nu/hoe8

Replies (4) Good night (1178) Bad night (232)
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(586): View more from Michigan

I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."

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(586): I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone." http://tfl.nu/272w

Replies (2) Good night (431) Bad night (271)

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