Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport

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  (313): awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport http://tfl.nu/bmz0
  Replies (25) Good night (4940) Bad night (659)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7

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  (201): In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7 http://tfl.nu/idur
  Replies (153) Good night (1478) Bad night (4450)
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  (870): View more from Arkansas

  She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.

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  (870): She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call. http://tfl.nu/dsl8
  Replies (8) Good night (808) Bad night (4174)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while

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  (425): Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while http://tfl.nu/c37v
  Replies (15) Good night (4617) Bad night (1201)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?

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  (360): Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me? http://tfl.nu/3uhh
  Replies (16) Good night (1144) Bad night (3600)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  he asked me to hangout with him...and his son

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  (413): he asked me to hangout with him...and his son http://tfl.nu/p42y
  Replies (17) Good night (922) Bad night (5276)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year

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  (704): 2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year http://tfl.nu/2ypx
  Replies (7) Good night (1840) Bad night (824)
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  (252): View more from North Carolina

  Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd

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  (252): Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd http://tfl.nu/1g97
  Replies (8) Good night (1309) Bad night (2280)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough

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  (423): The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough http://tfl.nu/ewgw
  Replies (5) Good night (2382) Bad night (870)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.

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  (917): There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit. http://tfl.nu/4wxu
  Replies (7) Good night (710) Bad night (1897)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.

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  (509): You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed. http://tfl.nu/gs8p
  Replies (7) Good night (1209) Bad night (878)
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.

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  (316): You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times. http://tfl.nu/0lcm
  Replies (3) Good night (771) Bad night (458)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!

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  (412): The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!! http://tfl.nu/4cxl
  Replies (7) Good night (652) Bad night (919)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again

  (1-425): View more from Washington

  But he was really hot

  (1-425): View more from Washington

  Glad you don't have HIV

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  (425): I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again (1-425): But he was really hot (1-425): Glad you don't have HIV http://tfl.nu/se36
  Replies (4) Good night (375) Bad night (856)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.

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  (757): You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part. http://tfl.nu/w83y
  Replies (4) Good night (667) Bad night (259)

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