i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
