Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
