Well apparently he's into motor boating.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
3 2 1 whiskey
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize