I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Randomize
