she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Randomize
