Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
