I want to stick my p in your. b.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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