Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
