I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize