Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
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I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
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I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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