ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
