We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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