erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize