girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
