taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
