she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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