after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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