then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
